Friday, January 18, 2019

Lost Within/Catharsis - by Nada Adel Sobhi


The wind blows upon my face. Eyes closed, I'm lost in my mind, memories, jumbled. I stand in the midst of a storm. Thoughts, ideas, dates, people, all flitting through, passing me by.

I stand still, not wanting them to take notice of me.

Let them pass, fly, run… disappear.

I feel the air caress my face, reminding me that I can withdraw from the dark depths within at any time.

I keep my eyes unfocused lest the flurry of my thoughts ceases its movement and hammers me down like a million arrows.

Cold.

Is it in my mind that I feel so lost, lonely, cold? Or it the outside world?

The wind picks up. I feel it. But it's not cold. Just suitable.

My head aches.

How?

I thought I was in my head. And yet there is that tinge of pain. A prelude to a migraine.

Then comes a buzz. A fly or a bee.

The wind picks up again, driving them away, restoring my surrounding peace.

At least there is peace somewhere in my world.

Faces; some I know, some I don't pass my vision.

Words: some kind, others harsh.

Gestures, emotions, situations, distant places… a waterfall, Niagara?

An avalanche. What? Where? I've never been to such a place!

The avalanche turns to black. My darker memories. Pains, regrets, fears, anger, all hurling towards me.

I duck, cover my head with my arms, brace myself for the crash, the fall, the darkness.

But there it is again. An orange butterfly passes me by; the wind pushes my hair away from my eyes, guides me to the light, to life, to the garden before me.

I open my eyes.


By: Nada Adel Sobhi

After writing Catharsis/Lost Within, I took a pic of the view.
Photography (not amazing) but by Nada Adel Sobhi

This piece can be called Lost Within or Catharsis or both, because that is what was - or is - for me.

I've been keeping it aside for some time, not sure when or if I should share it. But I finally decided to publish it and share it with the world. Because we all need to experience that sense of being bathed from within.

1 comment:

  1. I founded it amazing what you get of diving deep into those feelings, memories and mixed thoughts. And even though it may look gloomy and messy, it's how beauty begin to rise above and fill the soul.. Love it as always ♥♥

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