Wednesday, February 13, 2013

The Team and Me

‘You’re an important part of the team,’ they said, and yet a simple ‘Thank you’ I rarely get. It’s hard to feel appreciated when you’re waging in a sea of your own. They are a team; they have been for a while now. I know that at some point they were all mere strangers, but the barriers melted away with time; I don’t see my barriers budging anywhere anytime soon.

I’m different. What I do is different. I only feel part of ‘the team’ when there’s a crisis or when I’m needed, otherwise I feel like I’m just occupying space.

I try to talk and hang out with x, y and z, but they’re all so busy, or just busy, or just conversing with others, so I feel like a load and I hate feeling or being that, so I just silently occupy the space at my desk.

It’s been some seven months since I started working here and to be honest, with myself, I had expectations that were all obliterated. I admit: I want more. I don’t mean financially, coz I honestly and currently don’t care less, but I want more work, more life, more vigour, more fun.

I do not regret leaving my old and first work place for I must try something different and I am sure I have learnt many things here that I would never have learnt or encountered there. But still, there needs to be more to life than just trudging to work or just trudging out of bed every morning.

The status quo (to use a Latinism for a change) in Egypt is far from heart-warming and is certainly affecting everyone everywhere, no matter what they do or how they try to hide it.

It could be that; I’m sure ‘the team’ plays a role in my cold anger at the world and myself. Everything just seems so messed up and for an ambitious perfectionist, that’s just bad!

Where do I go from here? I haven’t a clue, but I most certainly need to find inspiration to get back in my ‘groove’ so I can begin my journey to being ‘Me’ again.

Good luck to me – and everyone else.


  1. I always say that writers have the ability to express what others feel, and you always do that, but I,ll put this aside and look at how you feel. Depreciation is one of the things that cause your frustration, in addition to disorganized method of work. I am glad you do not regret leaving your old job though you were productive, appreciated and happier, because these are steps in life and we don't look back, and we learn from every step. today's job is another step, take your time, learn, do your best, give it a fair chance, when the time comes, move on, and here's the advice, don't take long, it is not right for you, it's giving you depression, frustration, and draining you, take your time, and move, and keep your spirits high all along

  2. Its never good to feel unappreciated specially when you've worked hard, however I believe you should just be content with the fact that you are doing the best you can do in this job and even when there is no crisis you are usually on time and always try to do your work as perfect as possible. And whether the 'team' appreciates you or not, the truth you are important and beneficial and this is something that they can't take away from you. Your hard work will pay off eventually and if some people aren't grateful just remember that god is, and he will reward you for ur efforts. Be patient , stay positive, and keep doing your best.